To Those Who Have an Opinion II

To Those Who Have an Opinion...
      and Want to Share it Well,
(I'm preaching to myself today, friends--)

Dear Outspoken Friends Who Talk a Lot,

Thank you for keeping me honest. Thank you, to those with whom I disagree about a lot of things, for reminding me that we can dialogue well and truly agree to disagree. That is real friendship, not just echoing each other mindlessly and "liking" each other's posts vindictively. With some of you, we agree on most things, but not all. That is so important to me, to be reminded that no one--least of all me!--is perfect.


Dear Gracious Friends Who Listen Well,

Thank you for keeping me honest. Thank you, to those with whom I disagree about a lot of things, for reminding me, with reflective listening and quiet, concise statements, that I don't have all the answers, nor even most of them. That is real friendship, not just letting me rant and rave without stepping in to give me helpful pushback. With some of you, we agree on most things, but not all. That is so important to me, to be reminded that being passionate about something doesn't always necessitate being loud (all the time).


Dear Acquaintances Who Think Very Differently Than I Do,

Thank you for keeping me honest. Thank you for letting me into your lives, even just a little, whether digitally or otherwise. Please keep speaking up and speaking out about what matters to you. I want to know. With the help of the Holy Spirit, I long to see your voices valued, your humanity affirmed, your viewpoints clarified. It is so important for me to be reminded that there is a big world out there, that all people bear the beautiful image of God--even the hateful ones!--and that I have much to learn from others.


Dear Silent Friends Who Watch and Listen,

At first I was angry that so few of you were engaging on social media. Then some of you reminded me, gently, that perhaps social media isn't the best place to engage in these discussions (debates). And many of you, while silent in my social media feeds, are very vocal in personal relationships in your support of the "other," and insistence of respect for all people. So I apologize for judging you, and thank you for your willingness to challenge me. And I do encourage you to find where you can continue to speak truth, even if it is (most likely wisely) not on social media. We need your voices, friends. We need your viewpoints. We need to hear from everyone who has a voice, for in the exchange of ideas is a voice given to those who are without.


Dear Acquaintances Who Wonder Why No One Listens, Except Your Closest Friends,

Thank you for reminding me recently that there really are two types of you, those who are malicious and those who are just clueless. To the malicious ones, I am so done with you. I have tried, in good faith, to engage you and hear your viewpoints fairly. I have tried, in good conscience, to share my own viewpoints--to be vulnerable--and I (naively) assumed I would be treated with due respect. I have learned my lesson. No more will I entertain your hateful comments as legitimate discourse. No longer will I open myself up to attack. I will do my best, clinging to the strength of Christ, to remember that you do bear the imago dei, even when you deny that in others (including myself). To the clueless ones, I will try to continue to engage with you, but I will probably have to withdraw at times. Trying to communicate with people who do not want to hear other's ideas is exhausting. Trying to engage with people when their words are hateful, but they claim not to be trolls, is frustrating. And trying to listen to people who never stop to listen in return is often fruitless.


Dear Me,

So we fall into many categories. Lord have mercy on our soul. (And why are we speaking in the plural about ourselves?) We need to listen better. We need to have more grace for people. We also need to not take the trolls' words to heart. We do bear the image of God, despite what some might say. We do belong where the Lord has called us, despite attacks that leave us feeling helpless and alone. We are valuable, loved, and deserving of respect and kindness that we should show to others. That's pretty clear in the Gospel.

Maybe the reason I'm using plural language is because it's not just me. It's every woman who's been berated for seeking an education. It's every person of color whose culture has been dismissed and denigrated. It's every "other" that sticks out and is chastised for the audacity to not fall into line with comfortable societal norms. Maybe the reason I'm using plural language is because all of us--even the trolls--need to be reminded that we're all humans, and all in this together.

Sincerely,
One Who Has an Opinion, and Then Some